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I am worn out waiting for your rescue, but I have put my hope in your word. My eyes are straining to see your promises come true. When will you comfort me? I am shriveled like a wineskin in the smoke, but I have not forgotten to obey your decrees. How long must I wait? – Psalm 119:81-84a (NLT)
They almost finished me off, but I refused to abandon your commandments. In your unfailing love, spare my life; then I can continue to obey your laws. – Psalm 119:87-88 (NLT)
Sometimes we get so caught up in our troubles that we have a hard time knowing God is there. We have a hard time feeling His presence, hearing His voice, holding onto His promises – and we feel worn out from our waiting. I appreciate the Psalmist’s honesty in these verses because I think that so often we feel guilty for feeling like God is not with us and beat ourselves up when we feel trapped in our circumstances but it is totally biblical to cry out to God and tell Him how we’re feeling. A lot of the time though, we wait around in hopes that God will speak and that we’ll hear His voice or see a sign when in fact, He has already spoken and His voice is right there in His word. When I am discouraged or need an answer about something, I go to His word in prayer. The truth is that while God does speak to us through His Holy Spirit, sometimes we need to be proactive by searching for His voice in the word. Everything in the Bible is God-breathed – every single word. So when the Psalmist says “BUT I have put my hope in your word”, “BUT I have not forgotten to obey your decrees”, “BUT I refuse to abandon your commandments” he is fully acknowledging that God’s word is a direct line to the throne. I understand that we get stuck in a rut of not feeling like what we read in the Bible is encouraging or helpful, and that is why I ask God to reveal Himself to me through it before I start reading. It is the most encouraging thing you could do – to open your heart and mind to what God might want to show you. The Bible is so relevant for you and I, but it’s not going to read itself to us. We have to seek God through it, we have to hear His voice through it, we have to learn from it and acknowledge/apply its truths to our lives.